I’ve started browsing YouTube at work because of my complete disillusionment lately. It feels like the longer that I’m in the games industry, the more picky I get. The more picky I get, the less able I am to put up with the BS from management. There’s something I want out of the games industry, and when I don’t get it… I feel I am wasting my time.

In any case, back to YouTube. I started watching some music videos for songs that I used to like. One in particular that I keep playing is I’d Do Anything for Love (but I Won’t Do That) by Meatloaf.

There’s a particular part of the lyrics that really strikes me:

Girl:
Will you raise me up, will you help me down?
Will you get me right out of this Godforsaken town?
Will you make it all a little less cold?

Boy:
I can do that! I can do that!

Girl:
Will you hold me sacred? Will you hold me tight?
Can you colorize my life, I’m so sick of black and white?
Can you make it all a little less old?

Boy:
I can do that! Oh oh, now I can do that!

Girl:
Will you make me some magic, with your own two hands?
Can you build an emerald city with these grains of sand?
Can you give me something I can take home?

Boy:
I can do that! Oh oh now, I can do that!

Girl:
Will you cater to every fantasy I got?
Will ya hose me down with holy water, if I get too hot?
Will you take me places I’ve never known?

Boy:
I can do that! Oh oh now, I can do that!

Girl:
After a while you’ll forget everything
It was a brief interlude and a midsummer night’s fling
And you’ll see that it’s time to move on

Boy:
I won’t do that! No I won’t do that!

Girl:
I know the territory, I’ve been around
It’ll all turn to dust and we’ll all fall down
And sooner or later, you’ll be screwing around

Boy:
I won’t do that! No I won’t do that!

So what wouldn’t I do for love?  People like to believe that they would do anything for love, but there are compromises that I think people shouldn’t ever make.  Some people become different people when there are pursuing love.  I don’t feel that this is something that people should ever do.  Love is not about being someone else.  Love is about being yourself… and feeling happy that you are who you are.  Love shouldn’t involve giving up on your dreams.  Dreams are what make up someone.  Maybe love can modify those dreams a bit, but I would never be happy with someone that made me forego what I have wanted my entire life.

So clearly, there are things that cannot be compromised for love.  These things must be understood by anyone that I am with.  And, in a sense, love is conditional… but barring these few unchangeables, I feel love is unconditional.  Life’s too short to be living someone else’s fantasy.  You have to work to live your own.

Why is it that there are so many things so elegant and beautiful about Japanese culture?  I’m not the only person who’s seen this either.  A lot of my friends are obsessed with Japanese things, ranging from manga and anime to real life dramas.  For me, anime had some influence on my perceptions of Japan early on, but what really made an impact on me was watching the real life dramas and seeing the music videos.

There’s something in Japanese culture, that I don’t get from my current culture.  It’s some missing hole.  Maybe it’s the way that Japanese film their movies and music videos, maybe it’s the muted reservation that makes the feelings and emotions so much more strong.  Maybe it’s because I’m truly moved by songs that I don’t even understand the lyrics to.

I guess this all just came up again because I was browsing a friend’s blog and found that she posted a link to a Japanese music video.  The song was just so beautiful, and the way they filmed it was magical.  It made me remember the time when I watched Long Vacation twice!  Watching these things makes me not feel guilty for feeling emotions.  American society really restricts what emotions are socially acceptable for guys… it makes me really mad sometimes.  I often wonder whether gay guys and girls get more freedom because they are “allowed” to show emotions.

Anyway, here’s a link to the video so you can see for yourself what I mean about Japanese media